Stay in tune

I have a guitar. When it sits too long, it gets out of tune. Even when I play it, it needs to be tuned every now and then so that it sounds its best. You are the same. You too need to stay in tune. You too need to take care of yourself. Take some time to tune yourself by doing something special for yourself each day. Get enough rest. That will help keep you in tune. Eat healthier foods and drink lots of water. That will help you stay in tune. The more you take care of yourself, the better you can take care of those children who need you so much.

Have a great day and a wonderful week-end.

Maryln

Who is in charge?

I was talking to a parent recently and said to the parent, “Who is in charge, you or the child?” The parent quickly answered, “My child.” It made me think about the large number of homes in which this is true. When children are in charge of their homes, they come to school thinking they can be in charge there too.

I am launching a new survey this week to see what you think? Do you think that children are in charge of their homes or that their parents are? I am curious what you think. Go to www.atiseminars.org to make your voice heard.

Regardless of who is in charge at home, it is important that you are in charge of your classroom. Children need adults to have wisdom, to set boundaries, to give them freedom within limits. The limits help them to feel more secure, and they learn to thrive in those limits. They need to be able to make choices, to have their own voices heard, but all within the loving framework of teachers who are in charge of their classrooms. If every child could do everything they wanted whenever they wanted, it would be chaos. There are many homes today that have that chaos. It’s a good thing that children have you to help them learn how to live in the real world with its limits and boundaries and to learn how to make positive choices within those limits.

Have a great day.

Maryln

Tattling versus reporting

There are some children who chronically tattle. They come running to their teacher with all kinds of stories, some true and some untrue. They do this not only when they are small, but also as they grow into teens and adults.

Last week I put the finishing touches on a book about bullying. In this book I spoke about the importance of children reporting any bullying incidences so that victims of bullying can be protected.

Children do not naturally know the difference between tattling and reporting. They need to be taught this difference. There are some stories that you want to hear. You want to know if another child is being hurt. You want to know if your own student is being hurt.

Teach children the difference between tattling and reporting. Tattling is done to get someone else in trouble. Reporting is done to help someone. Explain this to the children. Give examples of each and do role plays if appropriate. Children need to learn this important difference.

When children tattle or give a report, stay calm. That is very important. If it’s a report, take action. The child needs help. If it’s a tattle, you can use the “Sounds like” approach. Here’s an example, “Sounds like that made you upset. What can you do about it?” This puts the responsibility on the child to solve the problem.

Have a great day.

Maryln

The little light that keeps burning

I have had an amazing thing happen. You may know that I lost my daughter several months ago. It has made my heart filled with sorrow and loss for what can never be. The loss was compounded with the recent two-year anniversary of the loss of my mom. Her last message to me was that she wanted me to go on smiling in the words of one of her favorite songs that she sang to me as a child. The words she especially liked were, “When you are smiling, the whole world smiles with you.” She loved that song, and she told me those words often.

On the two-year anniversary of my mom’s passing away, I lit in my home a tiny battery-operated teacup candle and said a little prayer for her. The candle should have burned less than 24 hours and then gone out. The most amazing thing is that I am writing this to you on the ninth day after lighting this little candle, and it is still flickering light. There is no logical explanation for this. I have lit many of these little battery operated candles, and they always go out within approximately twelve hours. At the end of the first day, I was amazed that it was still lit. By the second day I was telling my friends that something unusual was happening. By the end of one week, I was even more amazed, and now, I am choosing to see this as a message from my mom, to live, to laugh, and more than anything, to smile. So I am sharing this little candle story with you today so that you too remember to find your smile and your joy. This little candle with its flickering light is a message of hope.

Have a great day and keep smiling.

Maryln

Structure, structure, and more structure

Last week I wrote a survey about disrespect that is on our web site. I believe that a major factor for children having less respect is the lack of structure in their homes. There frequently is no schedule, no consistency, and no routine. Children thrive on structure.

While you can’t control what happens in the home, you can control what happens in your classroom. Provide lots of structure. It provides a sense of security for children.

Have a great day and a wonderful week.

Maryln

P.S. If you have not yet taken the survey on children and respect, go to www.atiseminars.org and make your voice heard.